With that in mind, opening up and getting to know someone does take a certain amount of patience.Assess each new partner as an individual, and stay keenly connected with how you experience yourself while in his or her presence.Millennials especially are unencumbered by fears that may have held people back from having sex in the past, says Helen Fisher a biological anthropologist and chief scientific adviser to Match, who helped develop the representative survey of more than 5,000 singles.“We have a real misunderstanding of Millennials,” she said.“I think they are very career oriented, so sex before the first date could be a sex interview, where they want to know if they want to spend time with this person.”In many ways sex has become a less intimate part of dating, according to Kimberly Resnick Anderson, a certified sex therapist.You need someone with whom you can reveal your authentic self, not just a piece of you—and you are the only one who can bring that full you to the table.
It is important to have boundaries and to not reveal more or do more than you are completely comfortable with.
(FWIW, studies suggest that there’s good reason to get it on as soon as possible if you want to cash in on awesome honeymoon-phase sex.)Like we said, there’s no “right” time; deciding when you’re ready to have sex with someone is really a different-strokes-for-different-folks kind of thing.
But what leads couples to hit the sheets at any given moment in their relationship? To get a better idea, we asked women in long-term relationships to divulge how quickly they had sex with their significant others.
Her study of almost 300 college-aged men and women found that it did.
Though not a clear indicator of the exact timing to have sex, Mett’s study did provide a checklist of potential steps partners should take before they get physical.